Can't comment on 2, but 1 isn't that difficult if you've got a fairly good knowledge of PHP or ASP and SQL. I'm in the process of setting up a membership site using PHP and MySQL.
The main things you need to worry about are dealing with sessions so that you can track the users within the site, storing the user details (password encryption etc), validating users (i'e email address verification). You also need to add in extra pages for users to update their accounts and any admin pages that you need. Finally, you need to protect your pages from being accessed by non-members.
I got the basics from a PHP book that I got ages ago and modified it from there to include things like email validation and pages that can be accessed by members and non-members.
Probably took me about 10 - 15 hours to get the basics in place and design a template for protecting the pages.
That said, there are ready coded user management systems available (freeware and shareware) - they just didn't do everything I wanted them to.
And to answer your other question as long as the distance between the two ends!
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