This isn't what your asking for, but it will tell you when your server is down, rather than a general problem somewhere else on the net.
All you need to do is set-up a script to write the date and time to a database at a regular interval. E.g. every 300 seconds. Set the script to restart in the event of a server restart and you will have a simple logfile that contains time gaps when the server was down.
If you want to monitor it remotely you could run the script on a cron job, that sends an email each time it runs, On your monitoring server it would check for the receipt of the emails. If an email fails to arrive, fire off an sms. You will get false alarms occasionally due to network problems, but you can go back to your db logfiles to ascertain if was your server or something else.
Alternatively you could use the monitoring server to scrape the output of the script on the original server. If there is an unexpected delay between updates, fire off an sms.
It would probably take your developer a day or two max to get something set-up.
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